A question about "the arm"...

We've actually been asked some odd question about our sons arm such as "What do you think of his arm?"

What do we think of it? It's an arm, his arm. Albeit missing from 2 inches below his elbow, it's just an arm. ACTUALLY, we love his arm. If he didn't have it, we wouldn't have him, plain and simple.

Another is "What to you think when people look at it?"

That curiosity has the best of them. Which of you has ever seen a tiny little Chinese boy with a missing hand running around all willy nilly? Until we saw a photo of our son, I know that I hadn't. Actually, I didn't even know what our son's special need was initially. I saw a photo of him from the shoulders on up and knew that he was the child we'd been waiting for. It wasn't until we requested his file for review that we knew what was special about him.

Yet another "How do you handle when people ask about his arm?

We answer them as honestly as possible. We don't know how come or why it didn't grow. We assume ABS (amniotic band syndrome) but he doesn't have any actual banding marks on him anywhere. Maybe it just simply was never supposed to be there anyway, who knows. I'm sure the time will come when someone says something rude or hurtful. How will I handle it? I'd like to say with grace, but I'm not so sure. We all know not to mess with a bears cubs. I guess that will depend on if our children are with us or not when the question is asked. But I will try to handle it the best I can at that time.

and "Geez, I guess it really limits what he can do?"

News flash - we're yet to find anything that he can't do that is appropriate to his age. He walks up and down stairs, can climb on the table (although not allowed to), open doors, waive with it, hit his sister with it when he's mad (also not allowed to), pet the dog, hit a balloon, etc.

His arm doesn't define who he is. It doesn't make him any more or less special. It doesn't impede his ability to love, laugh, smile, hug, wave hello or goodbye. When he falls down and hurts it, we kiss it to make it all better, because it's just an arm.

For us it's a blessing. For him it's just how he's made.